I'm So Very Sad

I'm writing this post while sobbing my eyes out. I started to drive to work this morning and found my beautiful baby Changa on the street, hit by a car. I tried so hard to stop her from going out last night, but she fought me and got herself out the door, I couldn't stop her. I feel so guilty, I should have tried harder, I didn't want her outside and now she is gone. I never wanted to see her like that, I can't get the horrible image out of my head. My lovely, evil baby is gone. I want my baby Changa. I can't stop crying. Max keeps asking for her and it is breaking my heart. He brought me a picture he drew and said "Here's Changa mommy, don't cry". I feel empty, I see her dishes and her litter box and I want to curl into a little ball. I don't even know what to say, I don't know what to do, I miss her so much already. She was far from perfect, but she was my baby, she's been with me as long as I have been in Cancun. Good times, bad times, hurricanes, the birth of Max, she's been there when I have had no one else. I'm so sorry my baby girl, I am so sorry I let you out. Please be at peace wherever you are my little girl, I love you.


R.I.P. Changa
February 2004-May 2008

Comments

My3Ro's said…
Oh Kelly, I am so sorry. She will be missed and your heart will stop breaking. She is now in the rainbowa always watching you. I know no comfort can be found for you right now. I send my love hon.

The Rainbow Bridge
inspired by a Norse legend
By the edge of a woods, at the foot of a hill,
Is a lush, green meadow where time stands still.
Where the friends of man and woman do run,
When their time on earth is over and done.

For here, between this world and the next,
Is a place where each beloved creature finds rest.
On this golden land, they wait and they play,
Till the Rainbow Bridge they cross over one day.

No more do they suffer, in pain or in sadness,
For here they are whole, their lives filled with gladness.
Their limbs are restored, their health renewed,
Their bodies have healed, with strength imbued.

They romp through the grass, without even a care,
Until one day they start, and sniff at the air.
All ears prick forward, eyes dart front and back,
Then all of a sudden, one breaks from the pack.

For just at that instant, their eyes have met;
Together again, both person and pet.
So they run to each other, these friends from long past,
The time of their parting is over at last.

The sadness they felt while they were apart,
Has turned into joy once more in each heart.
They embrace with a love that will last forever,
And then, side-by-side, they cross over… together.
Anonymous said…
Kelly - as a fellow cat lover, my heart is broken for you. I know all too well the pain of losing a furry friend. Time will heal, and she will live on in your memory forever.

When you're ready for a kitten, Lupita, who has a souvenier shop right next to Bucanero's Hotel on Hidalgo on Isla Mujeres has two beautiful kittens for adoption. I almost took one home last week.

Take care & Max will help you through this - what a little angel he is!

JoAnne in CT
Anonymous said…
I'm so sorry for your loss Kelly. I know how heartbreaking it is when you lose a furry loved one. Know that time will heal your heart. Just be strong for Max. What a sweetie for drawing you a picture of Changa!!!

Kim
I'm sorry for your loss Kelly.
Ale said…
I am sorry Kelly :( I know that pets are more than that, they could become so important, like part of your family!
*hugs*
heatherinparadise said…
Oh, I am so sorry, Kelly! Poor Changa! (((hugs)))
Manolo said…
Mi más sentido y sincero pésame. Un abrazo grande grande...
Mexico Way said…
Oh man Kelly I am so sorry. I am in love with my little ones for the same reasons as you. They have been with me through so much.

Sending you giant virtual hugs.

She sure was a sassy kitty that's for sure.
So sorry for your loss!!! Our pets become one of our best friends and family.
Jennifer said…
Kelly
I am so so sorry for your loss of Changa. ((((((((((HUGS))))))))))

Hold tight to Max.

Te quiero amiga!
~Jennifer
Melissa said…
Pobrecitas las dos...but PLEASE don't beat yourself up for letting her out, as you'll kill yourself with guilt. Just grieve and miss her and appreciate the time you had with her.
Hola Kelly,

I feel for you as my family had to put down our 13 1/2 year old dog two weeks ago. Even though our situation was quite different, a loss of a beloved pet is still a difficult thing to have to deal with. Focus on the great times you had together and you will get through this much more smoothly. I wish you all the best.

Sincerely,
Eric Rabinowitz (author)
Mimi said…
Oh, Kelly, I'm so sorry to hear about Changa. Please stop beating yourself up, and know that you gave her a wonderful life. (((Hugs))))
Brenda said…
I am so sorry that you have lost part of your family.
Robin said…
I'm one of your lurkers but had to come out of lurkdom to offer a great big hug!!! My daughter's orange tabby met the same fate several weeks ago and we still miss her terribly. Bailey and Changa are chasing rodents in kittyheaven I'm sure.
I'm soooo sorry sweetie.
Hugs from Missouri.
oh ms kelly m. i am so sorry about your cat. x
Jeanne said…
So sorry to read this.
RiverGirl said…
I'm so sorry Canuck! Here's another big virtual hug!
I am sorry for your loss. But Cannucka no one, not even you can keep a cat in who wants to be out. You didn't cause it, the idiot who ran her over did. It's sad enough that she has gone, don't blame yourself.
regards,
Theresa
lisaloveloca said…
Take two-

My heartfelt condolences to you. It really is very sad. I'm just so sorry that you had to see poor Changa like that. It is traumatizing. Hugs and love sweetie. Bendiciones a Changa sea donde sea. *hugs you again*
wayne said…
Kelly, just adding my hugs. Nothing any of us say will make it better. Only time will do that. I agree with Theresa, it is the driver's fault, not yours. I choose to let my cats run free outside when they want, knowing I may find the same thing one day. But I believe they are happier just left to be cats when they want.
Anonymous said…
Big hugs to you and your family! I feel so bad for you.
CancunCanuck said…
My heartfelt thanks to all of you for your kind words and thoughts. It has been a horrible day, I can't stop crying. Max keeps asking for Changa, calling for her and looking for her, it is breaking my heart. I miss her so much. I do feel guilty, I hope that will stop, I just can't help it right now.

The fact that so many of you took the time to write means a lot to me, thank you to all and thanks to the lurkers who came out of the dark to say something kind. There is still a lot of kindness in this world, you have just demonstrated that to me and I thank you.

Good night sweet Changa.
Anonymous said…
Kelly, I'm so sorry for your loss. I too have lost pets and I know the hurt that you are feeling right now. My very first pet ever was a dog named Vagabundo, he too got out and got killed by a car right in front of my house. It was horrible, and till this day I get choked up thinking about it. But just think of all the wonderful years you had with her and how lucky she was to have you guys as her family.
(((abrazos)))
Velvet
CancunCanuck said…
Thanks Velvet, it is a tough time for us for sure. I still remember every pet I have had and cry over many of them. Poor Vagabundo and poor little you, he obviously made quite an impression.
Im not sure if Im just too emotional, but Im crying like an idiot.... I cant tell you how sorry I am... Im TRULY sorry!! I knew how much you loved her, and I just can imagine the pain you have right now....
Tulum Guera said…
So sorry to read this blog. Brought tears to my eyes.
My Bailey (3 year old chihuahua) went to sleep one afternoon and never woke up. God is mysterious.
Both our angels are in heaven. No matter what.. they always remain in your heart. RIP.
V.M. said…
Hello Kelly,

I was doing research on the Xtabay Women and I found your "I'm So Very Sad" article. I would like to share with you information that will change your life. Death is a hard thing to overcome and life is filled with heartache, but there is one thing, someone rather, that can significantly reduce your pains. Please except Jesus as you Savior. There is life after death and it's in a perfect place called heaven with God as it's righteous ruler. Being righteous He can't allow sin into heaven's gates, which means we'd have to live a flawless, sinless life to get into heaven. But God is omniscient and understands that is it IMPOSSIBLE for us to live a perfect life. That's where Jesus comes into play! Jesus lived a perfect life and then He willingly suffered and died on the cross! Jesus covers, with his own pure blood and life, the cost for our sins becasue we can't possible pay for them ourselves. Because God loves you SOOOOO much he doesn't want YOU the Canuck in Cancun to suffer an eternity in hell so He made a way for you to get to heaven. Jesus is that way. All you have to do is accept Jesus as payment for you sins! Pray and ask Him to come into your heart and guide you. I promise you will find true joy in the Lord! I do not promise, however, that trouble and heartache will never find you just becasue you are a child of God, but when it does find you...God will be there with wide open arms say, "Kelly, I love and always will. Let me bare your burden witho you."

Don't turn away God's FREE gift. Pray. God will listen. But most importantly read God's word (the Bible).

"For the wages of sin is death; but the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord."-Romans 6:23

I love you in the Lord and I will be praying for you. God Bless.

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